我们这里的澡堂

洗澡应该是一件快乐的事情。要不然怎么会有那么多人喜欢在澡堂子里放声歌唱呢？

Taking a bath should be a joyful experience. Otherwise, why would so many people enjoy singing loudly in the bathhouse?

——开始只是一个人在哼，后来另一个人随着调子唱出声来。就这样，一个接一个地，最后就开始了大合唱。

——It started with one person humming, then another joined in with the melody. Just like that, one after another, it eventually turned into a chorus.

再后来，隔壁男澡堂也开始热烈地回应。异样的欢乐氛围在哗哗流水中一鼓一鼓地颤动，颤动，颤动，幅度越来越大，周期越来越短……这样的欢乐竟不知该如何收场。

Later, the men's bathhouse next door began to respond enthusiastically. The unusual atmosphere of joy vibrated in the flowing water, trembling, trembling, trembling, with increasing intensity and shorter cycles... Such joy ended up with no clear conclusion.

哪怕已经结束了，事后也想不起是怎样结束的。

Even after it had ended, I couldn't remember how it wrapped up.

有的时候自始至终只有一个人在唱，而且自始至终只唱一首歌，还只唱那首歌中高潮部分的最后两句。不停地重复啊，重复啊，像是刀尖在玻璃上重复刮刻……幸好这“重复”顶多只有洗完一次澡的时间那么长。

Sometimes there was only one person singing from start to finish, and they only sang the last two lines of the climax of one song. Repeating and repeating, like a knife edge scraping across glass... Fortunately, this "repetition" lasted only as long as it took to finish one bath.

要是如此重复一整天的话，肯定会令听者产生幻觉的。而且幸好这是在澡堂子里。澡堂微妙的氛围似乎可以包容一切神经质的行为。

If such repetition went on all day, it would surely drive the listeners to madness. And luckily, this was at the bathhouse. The subtle atmosphere there seemed to allow for all sorts of neurotic behavior.

回音总是很大。水在身体外流，久了，便像是在身体内流。

The echoes were always loud. Water flowed outside the body, and after a while, it felt like it was flowing inside the body.

很热。水汽浓重……不知道唱歌的那人有着怎样一副爱美的身子……她反复哼唱的那句歌词，始终分辨不清其内容，声调却尖锐明亮——尖锐明亮而难以分辨内容，真是一种奇妙的感触。

It was hot. The humidity was thick... I wondered what kind of beautiful body the person singing had... The lyrics they hummed over and over were hard to distinguish, yet the pitch was sharp and bright—sharp and bright yet impossible to discern, truly a wonderful sensation.

更多的时候是大家都在无意地、悠闲地哼着不成调的曲子。相互认识的人一边搓澡一边聊着无边无际的话题。

More often, everyone was unconsciously and leisurely humming out-of-tune melodies. People who knew each other chatted about endless topics while scrubbing their bodies.

这话题不停地分叉，越走越远，几乎自己都快要在自己的庞大复杂的分支迷宫中走失了。它们影影绰绰漂浮在澡堂中，忽浓忽淡。往排气扇方向集体移动，消失于外面干爽凉快的空气中。

The topics branched off endlessly, straying further and further, almost getting lost in their own vast and complex labyrinth of branches. They floated vaguely in the bathhouse, sometimes strong, sometimes faint. They collectively drifted toward the exhaust fan, disappearing into the cool, dry air outside.

歌声是次要的。唱歌的那人可能也并未意识到自己正在唱歌。身体一丝不挂，举止单纯，额外的想法暂停。

The singing was secondary. The person singing might not have even realized they were singing. Completely naked, their actions were simple, and any extra thoughts paused.

灵巧的又手不停地揉搓澡巾，洗过的长发在头顶扎成团歪倒在前额上。肤色水淋淋地明亮，身形交错。

With nimble hands, they continued to rub the bath towel, while the washed long hair was bundled messily on top of the head, falling unkempt onto the forehead. Their skin was bright and moist, the body intertwined.

男孩子们隔三差五地尖叫，甩着小鸡鸡跑来跑去。女孩子们则为自己为什么没有小鸡鸡而深感诧异。

Boys occasionally screamed, running around wildly. The girls were baffled about why they didn’t have a little penis.

家庭主妇们拎着水桶和盆，扛着搓衣板，挨个调试水龙头。后来终于找到水流相对大一点的龙头，然后摆开阵式，埋首肥皂泡沫中，赤身裸体地奋力对付天大的一堆脏床单、窗帘、被罩。

Housewives brought water buckets and basins, carrying washboards, each testing the faucets. Finally, they found one with a relatively strong flow and set up a position, burying themselves in a heap of soapy bubbles, naked, trying to tackle a huge pile of dirty bed sheets, curtains, and duvet covers.

年轻妈妈们还搬来了澡盆，澡盆里还漂着塑料玩具。妈妈们一边搓揉头发上的泡沫，一边厉声斥责孩子不要啃塑料鸭鸭，不要喝洗澡水。

Young mothers brought in bathtubs, floating plastic toys in the water. As they rubbed the foam from their hair, they sternly admonished their children not to chew on the plastic duck or drink the bathwater.

还有人正在努力刷牙，满嘴泡沫，浑身抖动。也不知要刷到什么程度才算完。何止牙齿，可能连扁桃体也没有放过。

Some were diligently brushing their teeth, mouth full of foam, shaking all over. It was uncertain how long they would need to brush. Not just the teeth, but perhaps even the tonsils were not left untouched.

老板娘和顾客在外面吵架，听声音，几乎快要动手了。

The proprietress and customers were arguing outside, and from the sound, it seemed they were about to come to blows.

这边又开始了新一轮大合唱。

Another round of singing began over here.

突然有小孩子惊天动地地大哭，四处喊着找妈妈。找到妈妈后，妈妈顺手抽他一个大耳刮。

Suddenly, a child cried out loudly, desperately calling for their mother. Upon finding her, the mother promptly gave him a big slap on the ear.

澡堂里总是热气腾腾、水汽缭绕。人多的时候，更是又闷又挤，有时得三个人共用一个龙头。

The bathhouse was always hot and steamy. When it was crowded, it became both stuffy and cramped, and sometimes three people had to share a faucet.

人与人之间，最轻微的接触间有最黑暗的深渊。不时有陌生人挤过来主动提出要帮我搓背。被我谢绝后，她会立刻请求我帮她搓背。

Between people, the slightest contact held the darkest abyss. Strangers occasionally squeezed over to offer to scrub my back. After I declined, they would immediately request me to scrub theirs.

龙头和龙头之间没有隔挡，洗澡的人面对面站着，看过来的视线中途涣散。水很大，一股一股地奔泻。

There was no barrier between faucets, and bathers faced each other, their gazes scattering midway. The water flowed heavily, gushing forth.

澡堂中间的大池子水汪汪的，不时有小孩在里面摔倒的声音。但尖利的哭声要酝酿三秒钟之后才能迸发出来。

In the center of the bathhouse, the large pool had a shimmering surface, occasionally punctuated by the sound of children falling in. However, the sharp cries took three seconds to build up before bursting forth.

外面的更衣室四壁和天花板悬满水珠，一滴一滴冰凉迟缓地落下。灯光静止、幽暗。正在穿衣服的人肢体洁白，面目模糊。

The walls and ceiling of the changing room outside were hung with water droplets, cool and slowly dripping down. The light was still and dim. The one getting dressed had white limbs and a blurred face.

却有人端着一大盘热气腾腾的炒菜汤饭，笔直穿过更衣室，掏出钥匙，打开尽头的小门闪进去。等她再出来时，已经换了身衣服，拿着雨伞，挽着小包。

Yet someone was carrying a large plate of steaming stir-fried dishes and rice, walking straight through the changing room, pulling out a key to open a small door at the end and slipping in. When she came out again, she had changed into a different outfit, holding an umbrella and a small bag.

她把门依旧锁上，穿过更衣室，消失在另外一扇门后。这个更衣室为什么有那么多的门？

She locked the door back up, walked through the changing room, and disappeared behind another door. Why were there so many doors in this changing room?

有衰老的身体背对着我站着，身体濡湿，衬裙多处浸成了透明。她没有办法将身体擦干，她太胖了，手臂不能转到后面，不能抬得更高。

There was an aging body standing with its back to me, wet and with sections of her slip soaked through to transparency. She couldn't wipe herself dry; she was too fat, and her arms couldn’t reach behind her or lift higher.

她低声唤我：“孩子，孩子……”又说道：“拉一拉吧……”她是一个哈族老人。

She called out softly, "Child, child..." then added, "Pull it a bit..." She was an elderly woman from the Hazar tribe.

我走过去，看到她的衬裙在背后拧成了一股绳。我伸手去拽，感觉到肌肤和衬裙间的巨大摩擦力。水很顽固。我帮着拽了好一会儿才将布料弄平展。

I walked over and saw her slip twisted into a bundle at the back. I reached out to pull it, feeling the immense friction between her skin and the slip. The water was stubborn. It took me quite a while to flatten the fabric.

然后我沉默着走开，她也没有道谢。她很老很老了。老人不应该一个人出来洗澡。更衣室里有不祥的预兆。

Then I quietly stepped away, and she didn’t thank me. She was very old. Elders shouldn’t bathe alone. The changing room held ominous omens.

之前，我记得她关上水闸门后，站在微微滴水的水龙头下就开始穿衬裙。似乎不愿裸身经过旁边的年轻人。经过我时，伸手扶着我的胳膊，小心地走过水池边缘。

Previously, I remembered her shutting off the water valve, then standing beneath a slightly dripping faucet to begin putting on her slip. It seemed she was reluctant to cross in front of the younger patrons. As she passed me, she reached out to hold my arm and carefully walked along the edge of the pool.

然后再经过下一个人，再扶着那人慢慢地走过。接着又是下一个。沿途的水花一片一片地淋在她的衬裙上。她神情轻松。衬裙的蕾丝花边在腾腾的水汽中闪着光。

Then she passed by the next person, holding onto them to walk slowly by. Then the next one. The splashes along the way sprinkled water onto her slip. She looked relaxed. The lace trim of her slip shimmered in the rising humidity.

另有一个刚刚开始发育的女孩，水淋淋的皮肤光滑黝黑，身子颀长柔弱，每一处起伏，都是水波静止后唯一不肯停息的一道涟漪……鸟起飞之前瞬间的凝息。鸟羽干净，翅子微张……还有水晶中自然形成的云雾——透过这块水晶，看向蓝天，那云雾轻微地旋转。

Another girl, just beginning to develop, had glistening, damp, dark skin, her body tall and slender, with every curve creating an unending ripple, the last stillness before a bird takes flight... With feathers clean, wings slightly spread... And the mist naturally formed within the crystal—looking through this crystal toward the blue sky, the mist softly spun.

而最美的是位于那旋转正中央静止不动的、纤细的轴心。她站在水中，水花四溅。

And the most beautiful was the delicate axis point standing still in the swirling center. She stood in the water, splashes flying.

我亲眼看到，那水花并不是触着她的身体才溅开去，而是触着了她所散发出来的光芒才溅开去。

I saw with my own eyes that the splashes did not come from her body but from the light she radiated, splashed outward.

在澡堂洗澡，我这平凡的身子，平凡的四肢，不久后将裹以重重的衣裳，平凡地走在黄昏之中。这平凡的生活，这平凡的平安。

In the bathhouse, I, with my ordinary body and ordinary limbs, would shortly wrap myself in heavy clothes, walking blandly in the twilight. This ordinary life, this ordinary peace.

我不再年轻了，但远未曾老去。千万根头发正在生长，几处伤口正在愈合。患关节炎的双膝“嘎吱”微响，颈椎骨刺轻轻地抵着只能以想象感觉到的某处。

I am no longer young, but far from old. Countless strands of hair are growing, and several wounds are healing. My knees, afflicted by arthritis, creak slightly, while my cervical spine lightly presses against a spot that can only be felt in imagination.

疾病在身体深处安详地沉睡，呼吸均匀，而青春在一旁秉灯日夜守护。她想唤醒他，但忍了又忍，泪水长流……这些，都由我的身体小心裹藏着。

Illness peacefully sleeps deep within, breathing evenly, while youth vigilantly guards over it day and night. She wishes to awaken him but endures again and again, tears flowing in abundance... All of this is carefully tucked away within my body.

我的身体正站在水龙头下的激流中。很多次发现澡堂里最后只剩下了我一人。空旷，寒冷。澡堂中央的大水池平静明亮。

My body is standing in the torrent under the faucet. Many times I found that I was the last person left in the bathhouse. Empty and cold. The large pool in the center of the bathhouse was calm and bright.

我去洗澡，不知为何总是会忘记带一样东西。这样东西常常会是梳子。于是走出澡堂时，湿答答的头发总是胡乱纠结着的。

Whenever I went to take a shower, I didn't know why I always forgot one essential item. Often it was a comb. So when I walked out of the bathhouse, my damp hair was always in disarray.

有两次忘了带毛巾，只好站在更衣室里慢慢晾干。

There were two times I forgot to bring a towel, and I had to stand in the changing room, slowly drying off.

忘记带拖鞋的话，一进更衣室就会发现。然后匆忙回家取。等拎着拖鞋回来时，健忘的老板总会让我再付一次钱。

If I forgot to bring slippers, I would realize it as soon as I entered the changing room. Then I would hurriedly go home to fetch them. When I returned carrying the slippers, the forgetful proprietress would always make me pay again.

忘带香皂的时候，就用洗发水代替。忘带洗发水了，就用香皂洗头发。但是有好几次，香皂和洗发水同时忘带了。

When I forgot to bring soap, I used shampoo instead. If I forgot the shampoo, I would use soap to wash my hair. But there were several times when I forgot both soap and shampoo.

后来，我就用一张纸条把需要带的所有东西一一记下来。等下一次出门时，对着纸条清点物品，这才万无一失地出门。

Later, I started making a list of all the things I needed to bring. The next time I went out, I would check items against the list to ensure I didn’t forget anything.

可是，到了地方才发现还是忘带东西了，而且是最最重要的……钱，两块钱，洗一次澡的两块钱……

However, when I got to the place, I still discovered I had forgotten something, and it was the most important thing... money, two yuan, the two yuan to take a bath...

于是我又在纸条上把“钱”这一项加上。

So I added "money" to the list.

可是等到再下一次时，出门之前却忘记了看纸条……

Yet the next time, I forgot to even check the list before leaving...

再再下一次，干脆连纸条都找不到了。

Even further, the next time, I couldn't even find the list.

……

……

去澡堂洗澡，带必备的用品——这是很简单的事情，我却总是做不好。

Going to the bathhouse to wash up, bringing the essentials—this is a simple task, yet I always fail to accomplish it properly.

当我侧着身子，又一次绕过水池走向我经常使用的一个龙头时，便拼命想：这一次忘记了什么呢？这一次又是什么在意识中消失了呢？还有什么是我没法感觉到、没法触及到的呢？

As I sidestepped, once again making my way around the pool towards a faucet I frequently used, I desperately wondered: what did I forget this time? What consciousness faded from my mind again? What else is unreachable, beyond my senses?

我侧着身子，在拥挤的森林中行进，草丛深厚，灌木浓密，树木参天。我发现一只静静伏在布满翠绿色字母图案的蛛网上的，背部生有红色塑料纽扣般明亮的奇妙器官的六脚蜘蛛……我轻轻地扒开枝叶，俯身在那里，长久地看着。

I sidled through, navigating the crowded forest, where the greenery was thick, and the trees were towering. I spotted a quietly lying spider on a web adorned with emerald letters, with peculiar appendages like bright red plastic buttons on its back... I gently pushed aside the branches and leaned down there, watching for a long time.

这时有人从我背后悄悄走开，永远走开……而在此之前，我已在这森林里独自穿行了千百年，没有出口，没有遇到任何人。

At that moment, someone quietly walked away from behind me, walking away forever... And before that, I had wandered alone through this forest for hundreds of years, with no exit and no one to meet.