章节十三

小草跟着校医走了出去，陈寻替方茴拉了拉被子说：“再歇会儿，第一节课别上了。”

Xiaocao followed the school doctor outside. Chen Xun adjusted Fang Hui's blanket and said, "Rest a bit longer, don't attend the first class."

“好。”

"Okay."

这么近距离的单独相处，让方茴有些紧张，她索性闭上眼睛，不再看陈寻。

Being so close alone made Fang Hui a bit nervous, so she simply closed her eyes and stopped looking at Chen Xun.

“刚才吓死我了。”陈寻仿佛自言自语的低声说，方茴不由得偷偷红了脸。

"I was scared to death just now." Chen Xun seemed to be talking to himself, and Fang Hui couldn’t help but blush secretly.

“知道我为什么这么担心你吗？”

"Do you know why I was so worried about you?"

“你……是好人。”方茴轻轻地说。

"You... are a good person." Fang Hui said softly.

“哈？我是好人？你看别人晕了我这不这样！蒋主任在后面喊我，我都没理他！”

"Huh? I'm a good person? You see others faint, and I don't react like this! Director Jiang called me from behind, and I ignored him!"

方茴的睫毛一点点的颤动起来，她隐约明白了点什么，但这样的感觉让她一半陶醉一半畏惧。

Fang Hui's eyelashes began to flutter. She vaguely understood something, but the feeling made her half intoxicated and half fearful.

“你真不知道？还是装不知道？”陈寻有点失望的说，“直说了吧，我……”

"You really don't know? Or are you pretending not to know?" Chen Xun said somewhat disappointedly. "Let’s be straightforward, I..."

他话没说完，乔燃就回来了。

Before he could finish, Qiao Ran came back.

他买了醒目苹果的汽水和牛肉汉堡，还有一袋彩虹糖。

He had bought bright apple soda and beef burgers, along with a bag of rainbow candy.

“等急了吧？我让小卖部把汉堡热了。”乔燃说，“刚才聊什么呢？气氛这么沉重！”

"Were you waiting long? I had the snack bar heat up the burgers." Qiao Ran said. "What were you guys talking about? The atmosphere is so heavy!"

方茴低下头没有吭声。

Fang Hui lowered her head and stayed silent.

“没事儿，我吓唬她来着！”陈寻撕开彩虹糖的口袋，往嘴里扔了一颗绿色的糖果。

"It’s fine, I was just scaring her!" Chen Xun tore open the bag of rainbow candy and tossed a green candy into his mouth.

那粒糖酸酸的，就如同他现在的心情和那句缠绕在心底没能说出来的喜欢。

That piece of candy was sour, just like his mood now and the confession of affection tangled in his heart that he couldn't express.

那一整天的课，方茴都上得晕晕乎乎的。

Fang Hui was dizzy throughout the lessons that day.

陈寻的欲说还休在她脑袋里不停转悠，一会儿想，难道他的意思真的是……喜欢？一会儿想，不会不会，他怎么会喜欢自己，明明和乔燃说了是吓唬她来着，还是不要自作多情。

Chen Xun's unfinished words kept swirling in her mind. For a moment, she thought, could it be that he really means... likes her? Then she thought, no, no way, how could he like her? He clearly told Qiao Ran that he was just scaring her; she shouldn't be so self-indulgent.

其实方茴肯定是有所期待的，她平时总在课间有意无意的瞄向后排，中午总会趴在窗户边上望着篮球场，和乔燃一起写作业也总是偷偷注意周围。

Actually, Fang Hui definitely had some expectations. She often looked back at the rear row during breaks, would lean by the window at noon to gaze at the basketball court, and always paid attention to her surroundings while doing homework with Qiao Ran.

在她这些散乱的视线中，聚集起来的那一点就成为了陈寻的影子。

In her scattered glances, the bits gathered together formed Chen Xun’s shadow.

她很明白，那个经常在她的身后大声呼喊她，经常在别人习惯性忽视她的时候惦记她，经常在她不知所措的时候偷偷照顾她的男孩，已经悄悄在她心里埋下爱恋的种子，长出了稚嫩娇美的芽。

She understood clearly that the boy who often called her loudly from behind, who remembered her when others habitually ignored her, and who secretly cared for her when she was at a loss had quietly planted seeds of love in her heart, which had now grown tender and beautiful sprouts.

16岁的喜欢就是这么平淡而简单，电影胶片中或欢喜圆满或凄美动人的爱情故事在他们眼里都当不了真，他们总认为自己会经历与众不同的恋爱，以为这样无所事事的日子会一直继续下去。

At 16, feelings of affection were so plain and simple. The love stories depicted in movies, whether happy endings or tragic tales, felt unreal to them. They always thought they'd experience a different kind of romance, believing these aimless days would continue endlessly.

然而，一直到长大以后他们才发现，原来还是在岁月里落入俗套，那时每天都陪伴在身边的人也终究各奔东西。

However, as they grew up, they realized they would eventually fall into the ordinary patterns of time; the people who once accompanied them daily would ultimately go their separate ways.

中午吃饭，方茴一直没有抬头。陈寻故意说很无聊的笑话，甚至去抢她饭盒里的肉丸子，但始终都未能让她正眼相对。

During lunch, Fang Hui didn’t lift her head once. Chen Xun deliberately told silly jokes and even tried to snatch the meatballs from her lunchbox, but she still wouldn’t meet his gaze.

吃完饭，乔烨拉陈寻去打球，小草拉方茴去拿信。两人一个一边，走在同一个楼道内，却分别去往了两个方向。

After finishing lunch, Qiao Ye pulled Chen Xun to play basketball, while Xiaocao took Fang Hui to get the mail. The two walked down the same corridor but went in different directions.

那时电脑是尚未普及的物件，所以没有QQ聊天，也没有电子邮件。更别提手机和短消息了，仅有的几个手机型号大概都还不具备中文短信的功能。

At that time, computers weren’t yet common, so there was no QQ chat or emails. Not to mention mobile phones and text messages; the few mobile phone models didn’t even support Chinese text messaging.

和外校同学之间，全是写信联络感情。每个学校的校门口都有小摊儿卖信纸，日本卡通的，韩式碎花纹的，偶像明星的，5块一沓可以撕取的，4块附带几枚小信封的，物美价廉，任君选择。

Communication between students from different schools involved writing letters. Each school had small stalls selling stationery—Japanese cartoons, Korean floral patterns, idol stars, five yuan for a stack to tear apart, four yuan with a few small envelopes included, affordable and readily available for choices.

小草是他们班收信最多的人，她的党羽遍布全北京，每周都有来自各个城区的飞鸽传书。

Xiaocao was the one in their class who received the most letters, with her network spread all over Beijing. Every week, she had carrier pigeons from various districts.

“你去翻那边那摞。”在传达室的窗台上，小草递给方茴一堆信。

"Can you check that stack over there?" Xiaocao handed Fang Hui a bunch of letters on the window sill in the post office.

“哦。”方茴接过去挑本班同学的信，不一会就找到了小草的两封。

"Okay." Fang Hui took them and searched for letters from their classmates, soon finding two letters meant for Xiaocao.

“诶！我看看！没想到她这么快就回了。”小草拿过来笑着说，“对了，方茴，怎么从来也不见你写信啊！你们初中同学都不联系啊？”

"Hey! Let me see! I didn't expect her to reply so quickly." Xiaocao said with a smile, "By the way, Fang Hui, why don’t you ever write letters? Don’t you keep in touch with your middle school classmates?"

“我和他们不熟。”

"I'm not close with them."

“不熟？”小草惊讶地说，“真有你的！”

"Not close?" Xiaocao exclaimed, "You’re something!"

方茴把信码好，站在一边等她，远处好像有男生进了漂亮的三分，一片欢呼的声音，她的眼神不自觉的又飘了过去。

Fang Hui neatly stacked the letters and stood aside waiting for her. In the distance, a boy seemed to make a beautiful three-pointer, and a chorus of cheers erupted, causing her gaze to drift unconsciously.

“我说……方茴……”小草举起一封信，朝着太阳看里面折成心型的信纸。

"I say... Fang Hui..." Xiaocao held up a letter toward the sunlight, in which the paper was folded into a heart shape.

“怎么？”方茴转过头，信封挡住了小草的眼睛，她只看见背面可爱的字迹写着“谢谢邮递员叔叔”。

"What?" Fang Hui turned her head, and the envelope blocked Xiaocao’s eyes; she only saw the cute handwriting on the back that said, "Thank you, mailman uncle."

“你……是不是喜欢陈寻啊？”小草轻轻地问。

"Do you... like Chen Xun?" Xiaocao asked softly.

“啊？”

"Ah?"

“是吗？”

"Is it true?"

“没……没有！”方茴的心扑通扑通跳了起来，被人窥探心事的感觉，让她忍不住的害怕，“你别乱说！”

"No... not at all!" Fang Hui's heart raced; being exposed to her feelings made her feel inexplicably afraid. "Don’t say nonsense!"

“哈哈！我就知道！”小草猛地把信放下来，雀跃的说，“你其实喜欢的是乔燃，对不对？”

"Haha! I knew it!" Xiaocao exclaimed, putting the letter down joyfully. "You actually like Qiao Ran, right?"

“什么啊！你真没意思！”方茴瞪了她一眼，扭头向楼里走去。

"What?! You're so annoying!" Fang Hui glared at her and turned to walk inside.

“别生气，别生气！”小草拽住她，神神秘秘的说，“我保证不告诉别人！”

"Don’t be mad, don’t be mad!" Xiaocao tugged at her, speaking mysteriously. "I promise I won’t tell anyone!"

“求你了，别瞎说八道了！”方茴一脸无奈。

"I beg you, stop talking nonsense!" Fang Hui said helplessly.

被小草惊吓了一下，方茴发现，面对称作喜欢的美好情感，她仍然会忍不住的害怕。这样的感觉，让她不禁沮丧心灰。

Startled by Xiaocao, Fang Hui realized that when faced with the beautiful emotion called love, she would still feel afraid. This feeling made her feel discouraged and disheartened.

本以为也就不了了之，但放学之前，陈寻却径直来到了方茴的面前。

She thought it would come to nothing, but before school was out, Chen Xun walked straight up to her.

方茴不知所措的胡乱收拾书包，就在想抓起笔袋的时候，却被陈寻一把按住了。

Fang Hui, bewildered, hurriedly packed her bag, and when she tried to grab her pencil case, Chen Xun pressed down on it.

他没有说话，只是把一张纸条放在了里面，方茴惊讶的看着他，他笑了笑说：“回家再看。”

He said nothing but slipped a note inside. Fang Hui looked at him, surprised, and he smiled and said, "Read it when you get home."

方茴没等到回家就看了，她实在禁受不住这种心惊肉跳，在回家的路上就拆开了纸条。

Fang Hui couldn’t wait until she got home. Unable to resist the anxious thrill, she opened the note on the way back.

然而，看完之后，她更加的心惊肉跳了。

However, after reading it, she was even more anxious.

那上面写着：“方茴，早上的话没说完，之所以担心你，不是因为我是好人，也不是因为我们是好朋友。而是因为，我喜欢你。不是开玩笑，我是认真的。如果你觉得我可以，就在我的历史作业本上把我的名字写上去。等着你！”

It read: "Fang Hui, what I wanted to say in the morning was left unsaid. The reason I’m worried about you isn’t because I’m a good person or because we are good friends. It’s because I like you. I’m not joking; I’m serious. If you think I’m worth it, write my name in my history homework notebook. I’m waiting for you!"

方茴是历史课代表，第一次发历史作业本，有一个上面没写名字，那个本就是陈寻的。

Fang Hui was the history class representative; the first time she submitted the history homework, there was one notebook without a name on it, and that notebook was Chen Xun's.

然而陈寻多少有点故意接近的意思，第二次交作业，他仍然没写名字，方茴知道是他，就直接给他送了过去。

However, Chen Xun seemed to be intentionally getting closer, as he left the name blank on the second submission as well. Fang Hui knew it was his and directly handed it to him.

好在历史课作业不多，方茴也就偷偷容忍了他含着些暧昧的恶作剧。

Fortunately, there wasn’t much homework for history, so Fang Hui silently tolerated his flirty prank.

明天有历史课，上周的作业又要发下来了，而这次，她是不是要写好名字给他送过去呢？

Tomorrow there would be a history class, and they were going to hand back last week's homework. This time, should she write her name neatly and give it to him?

在秋日的阳光里，她望着铺满银杏树叶金黄明亮的道路，手里攥着一个男孩子的心意，却感到一片迷茫。

In the autumn sunshine, she looked at the road covered with bright golden ginkgo leaves, holding a boy's affection in her hand but feeling lost.

现在的我，在听方茴讲完的关于她以前的事情之后，很能理解她当时复杂的心情。

Now, after hearing Fang Hui talk about her past, I can really understand her complex emotions at that time.

我明白她是多么犹豫挣扎，而无法简单写下她明明很喜欢的那个男孩的名字。

I realize how hesitant and struggling she was, unable to simply write the name of the boy she clearly liked.

但是，那时的陈寻是肯定不能明白这些的。

However, Chen Xun certainly couldn’t understand this at the time.

所以，第二天当他满怀希望的拿到历史作业本，却发现姓名后面的那条横线上依然空空如也时，他无比的心痛不甘。

So, the next day when he eagerly received the history homework book, only to find the line for the name still blank, he felt an immense heartache and grievance.

他十分的想去问问她，究竟是为什么，为什么在彼此眼中都看见了倾慕闪现，却执意逃避。

He wanted to ask her why—why, even when they both saw glimmers of affection in each other's eyes, they insisted on avoiding it.

可是方茴明显在躲着他，她那天几乎一直和小草或是乔燃待在一块儿，不看他，也不和他说话。

But Fang Hui was clearly avoiding him; that day she practically stayed with Xiaocao or Qiao Ran, not looking at him or speaking to him.

但是陈寻觉得，她一定不是讨厌自己的。因为她一直没有笑，那双纯净的眼睛里，满满的承着一种难以言状的悲伤。

Yet, Chen Xun felt she must not hate him. Because she hadn’t smiled at all, and in her pure eyes was filled with an inexplicable sadness.